This week's UK TV & radio

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Sunday : Monday : Tuesday : Wednesday : Thursday : Friday : Saturday : Sunday

Listings for Paramount 2 on Saturday, December 23 2017

06:00Teleshopping Teleshopping. 
09:00Malcolm In The Middle: Christmas Christmas Trees A layoff at work prompts Hal to make money selling Christmas trees. Francis and Piama's peaceful holiday comes to a crashing end when Otto's relatives show up at the ranch. (S5, E07) 
09:30Malcolm In The Middle: Christmas Hal's Christmas Gift Hal and Lois decide that all Christmas gifts this year should be handmade. When Hal sees the thoughtful gifts the boys made, he feels bad about his attempt and panics. (S6, E06) 
10:00Friends The One With The Monkey The gang makes, then breaks, a pact to celebrate New Year's Eve without dates. Ross compensates for his loneliness by getting a roommate... a monkey named Marcel. (S1, E10) 
10:30Friends The One With Phoebe's Dad Phoebe tries to track down her real father. Meanwhile, Ross asks Rachel to make a list of pros and cons about him. (S2, E09) 
11:00Friends The One With The Routine Joey plots the perfect opportunity to kiss Janine on a New Year's Eve dance show. Ross and Monica resurrect their high school dance routine for the broadcast. (S6, E10) 
11:30Friends The One With The Holiday Armadillo Ross dresses up as an Armadillo to try and teach Ben about Hanukkah. Meanwhile, Phoebe worries that Rachel wants to continue living with Joey. (S7, E10) 
12:00Takeshi's Castle One hundred contestants are gearing up in an attempt to storm Takeshi's Castle. Taking on Runaway Rockaway, they'll have to prove they've got what it takes. Jonathan Ross narrates. (S1, E01) 
12:30Takeshi's Castle Jonathan Ross narrates as a new batch of contestants head for the castle. Prepare for thrills, spills and a whole load of soggy shorts as they encounter Stepping Stone and Bridge the Gap. (S1, E02) 
13:00Takeshi's Castle A new bunch of contestants take on the head banging Knock Knock and the slip and slide Tug of war all to earn their place in the Final attack on the castle. Narrated by Jonathan Ross. (S1 E03) 
13:30Takeshi's Castle The guards stand to attention on slippery wall as another group of contestants attempt to reach the castle. With Honeycomb and Sumo also in their way, who will make it to the final attack? (S1, E04) 
14:00Bob's Burgers Burger Wars After getting wind of Bob's financial trouble, Jimmy Pesto faces-off against his mortal enemy by introducing burgers to his own menu. (S1, E10) 
14:30Bob's Burgers Weekend at Mort's The family has to stay next door at Mort the Mortician's house as the restaurant is infested with mold. Bob and Linda double date with Mort and his Internet-girlfriend. (S1, E11) 
15:00Bob's Burgers Torpedo Bob is thrilled when his baseball hero Torpedo Jones takes a liking to his burgers, but has misgivings when he realizes that Torpedo is just using the burger grease to cheat. (S1, E13) 
15:30Bob's Burgers Synchronized Swimming The kids find a way to escape gym class by doing a bogus study of synchronized swimming, but things get complicated when Linda becomes their swimming instructor. (S2, E03) 
16:00Impractical Jokers Hidden camera practical joke show. The guys must do dares in the park, try to get applause while quitting their jobs, and team up for dinosaur presentations. (S5, 03) 
16:30Impractical Jokers Hidden camera practical joke show. The Jokers cause mischief at the grocery store, try to give away items from the "mystery bag", and search for "The Chosen One" at a food court. (S5, E04) 
17:00Impractical Jokers Hidden camera practical joke show. The Jokers present never-before-seen footage. (S5, E05) 
17:30Impractical Jokers Hidden camera practical joke show. The Jokers cause mischief at the grocery store, try to give away items from the "mystery bag", and search for "The Chosen One" at a food court. (S5, E06) 
18:00The Middle The Christmas Tree When Axl comes home from college for Christmas vacation there's trouble. Meanwhile, Sue has a severe allergic reaction to the Christmas tree - could Christmas be ruined? (S5, E09) 
18:30The Middle The Christmas Wall Feeling unappreciated, Frankie decides on minimalist Christmas decorations this year. Meanwhile, thinking of Sue's allergies, Mike tries to purchase an artificial tree. (S6, E09) 
19:00The Middle No Silent Night When the Hecks decide to stay home on Christmas Eve and watch a mass on TV, an unexpected series of events occur. (S7, E10) 
19:30The Middle A Very Marry Christmas Sue keeps a holiday secret from the family. Meanwhile, Brick agrees to watch three kids, but soon regrets it. (S8, E09) 
20:00The Middle Thanksgiving Frankie cancels Thanksgiving. Mike and the kids try to pull Thanksgiving together for her. Meanwhile, Sue has a boyfriend whom everyone but her thinks is gay. (S1, E08) 
20:30The Middle Thanksgiving II Mike invites his brother Rusty and his father for Thanksgiving. Frankie encourages Mike, with his brother and father, to talk about their feelings. (S2 E09) 
21:00Friends The One With The Inappropriate Sister A bored Ross creates havoc in Joey and Chandler's lives, whilst Rachel is disturbed by her date's inappropriate relationship with his sister. (S5, E10) 
21:30Friends The One With All The Resolutions The friends all make New Year's resolutions, but Rachel's resolution to stop gossiping is becoming the hardest to keep. (S5, E11) 
22:00Friends The One With The Routine Joey plots the perfect opportunity to kiss Janine on a New Year's Eve dance show. Ross and Monica resurrect their high school dance routine for the broadcast. (S6, E10) 
22:30Friends The One With The Holiday Armadillo Ross dresses up as an Armadillo to try and teach Ben about Hanukkah. Meanwhile, Phoebe worries that Rachel wants to continue living with Joey. (S7, E10) 
23:00Rick and Morty Meeseeks And Destroy Rick provides the family with a solution to their problems, freeing him up to go on an adventure led by Morty. (S1, E05) 
23:30Rick and Morty Rick Potion #9 After Rick gives Morty a Love-potion for prom, things quickly spiral out of control when the Serum splices with the Flu. Rick and Morty scramble to cure the crisis. (S1, E06) 
00:00The Funny Thing About Christmas Johnny Vegas illuminates the minefield of Christmas rituals and traditions. Is it a fortnight of goodwill and festive cheer or just two days and a roast? (S1, E06) 
01:00Jeff Dunham's Very Special... ...Christmas Special. Sensational ventriloquist, Jeff Dunham, and his collection of comedic characters, including Achmed The Dead Terrorist, delight sold-out crowds in this unique Christmas Special. 
02:00Russell Howard's Good News Russell Howard picks his favourite bits from the second series. Tonight features; a penis biting racoon, country air in a jar, everything causes cancer, Christ's genitalia, and Russell Kane. 
03:20Your Face Or Mine Jimmy Carr and Katherine Ryan host the gameshow that puts couples to the test. Harry and Charlotte will be forced to judge all kinds of faces for the chance to win thousands of pounds. (S1, E01) 
03:45Your Face Or Mine Jimmy Carr and Katherine Ryan host the gameshow that puts couples to the test. Anthony and Jestina will be forced to judge all kinds of faces for the chance to win thousands of pounds. (S1, E02) 
04:10Your Face Or Mine Jimmy Carr and Katherine Ryan host the gameshow that puts couples to the test. Louis and Aida will be forced to judge all kinds of faces for the chance to win thousands of pounds. (S1, E03) 
04:35Two And A Half Men Phase One, Complete Charlie's relationship with his new girlfriend Wendy moves a stage too far when Jake and Evelyn become attached to her. Alan and Rose bond over a game of scrabble. (S1, E09) 
04:55Two And A Half Men Alan Harper, Frontier Chiropractor Alan realises that it is time to get a makeover when his own son mocks his look, but Alan and Charlie clash over what image is right for him. (S1, E11) 
05:20Two And A Half Men Camel Filters And Pheromones Berta brings her sexy, rebellious 16-year-old daughter to work, where Charlie and Alan develop an embarrassing crush on her. Megan Fox guest-stars. (S1, E12) 
05:40Two And A Half Men An Old Flame With A New Wick Charlie is in for a shock when he meets an ex-girlfriend who is not quite how he remembers her! Chris O'Donnell guest-stars. (S1, E18) 
06:00Teleshopping Teleshopping.