This week's UK TV & radio

Congratulations on being true to the origins of web browsing. These fancy new browsers supporting web standards, such as CSS, just detract from the pure accessibility goodness of this site.

Sunday : Monday : Tuesday : Wednesday : Thursday : Friday : Saturday : Sunday

Listings for Paramount on Wednesday, February 21 2018

06:00Teleshopping Teleshopping. 
08:00Scrubs My Dirty Secret Sex is the topic of the day at Sacred Heart. Dr. Cox can't find the time to have any with Jordan, Carla's thinking of abstaining and Elliot gives a patient an orgasm. (S3, E09) 
08:35Scrubs My Rule of Thumb Dr. Cox and Turk clash over a friend of Dr. Cox who needs a transplant. Carla and Elliot try to help out a dying patient who has a surprising final wish. Tara Reid guests. (S3, E10) 
09:008 Simple Rules Career Choices Bridget needs one of her parents' signatures for a permission slip that will allow her to drop her college prep courses. (S1, E14) 
09:308 Simple Rules Kerry's Big Adventure Kerry is shocked when a spark is ignited between her and Kyle and the two share a romantic kiss. Paul and Cate try to discover what is hidden in Rory's secret box. (S1, E15) 
10:00Friends: Season 2 The One With The Bullies Chandler and Ross run into two bullies at the coffee shop, one of whom steals Chandler's hat. Meanwhile, Phoebe meets a brother she never knew she had. (S2, E21) 
10:30Friends: Season 2 The One With Two Parties Complications ensue when Rachel's estranged parents show up at the surprise party that the gang planned for her. (S2, E22) 
11:00Friends: Season 2 The One With The Chicken Pox Phoebe catches chicken pox from the baby just as her navy boyfriend (special guest-star Charlie Sheen) surfaces for the first time in two years. (S2, E23) 
11:30Friends: Season 2 The One With Barry & Mindy's Wedding Rachel agrees to be maid of honour at her ex-fiancÚ's wedding. Monica ponders her future with Richard after he tells her he doesn't want children. (S2, E24) 
12:00Friends: Season 3 The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy Ross reveals a fantasy to Rachel involving a certain "Star Wars" character. Meanwhile, Monica suffers from insomnia after her breakup with Richard. (S3, E01) 
12:30Friends: Season 3 The One Where No One's Ready In a race against the clock, Ross tries to get the gang dressed and ready for a black-tie benefit at the museum. (S3, E02) 
13:00Impractical Jokers The guys must explain their off-colour resumes while applying for a job at a mobile phone shop, and complete a series of bizarre gestures at the ferry. (S6, E16) 
13:30Impractical Jokers Joe, Sal, Murr, and Q take their talents to Miami, pulling all new pranks on the beach. The guys zip around on scooters controlled by the other Jokers, and the loser has a cold blooded fate. (S7, E01) 
14:00Friends: Season 3 The One With A Chick And A Duck When Pete buys a restaurant, Monica must decide whether to accept his offer of employment there. Meanwhile, Joey and Chandler adopt a duck and a chick. (S3, E21) 
14:30Friends: Season 3 The One With The Screamer Ross thinks that Rachel's date (Ben Stiller) is crazy. Joey falls in love with Kate, but when she's offered a job in Los Angeles, she takes it. (S3, E22) 
15:00Friends: Season 3 The One With Ross's Thing Ross finds a strange growth on his buttocks and Phoebe can't choose between two guys. Meanwhile, Monica's boyfriend surprises her by not proposing...(S3, E23) 
15:30Friends: Season 3 The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion Phoebe sets Ross up on a date with a woman who used to be bald. Robin Williams and Billy Crystal guest star. (S3, E24) 
16:008 Simple Rules Come and Knock on Our Door The Hennessey household is unbearable as Kerry and Bridget continue to fight over Kyle, and Paul has a "Three's Company"-esque dream sequence. (S1, E16) 
16:308 Simple Rules Drummer Boy (Part 1): Bridget learns to play the drums and falls for her attractive, young drum teacher. (S1, E17) 
17:00Friends: Season 3 The One At The Beach The gang goes to the beach. Phoebe meets a family friend with links to her family's past and Ross discovers that Rachel still loves him. (S3, E25) 
17:30Friends: Season 4 The One With The Jellyfish Ross dates Rachel again after unwittingly agreeing to take responsibility for their breakup. Meanwhile, Monica gets stung by a jellyfish. (S4, E01) 
18:00Friends: Season 4 The One With The Cat Phoebe believes that the cat that jumped into her guitar case in Central Perk contains the spirit of her adoptive mum. (S4, E02) 
18:30Friends: Season 4 The One With The 'Cuffs: Monica tries to prove that she can cater a gourmet meal for her mother. Meanwhile, Chandler gets into an embarrassing situation while dating Rachel's boss. (S4, E03) 
19:00Friends: Season 4 The One With The Ballroom Dancing Joey teaches the building superintendent ballroom dancing in order to prevent him from evicting Rachel and Monica. (S4, E04) 
19:30Friends: Season 4 The One With Joey's New Girlfriend Joey thinks that Chandler hates Joey's new girlfriend, Kathy. However, little does he know, it's exactly the opposite. (S4, E05) 
20:00Friends: Season 4 The One With The Dirty Girl Ross's new girlfriend seems nearly perfect until he discovers that her apartment is incredibly dirty. Chandler becomes more familiar with Joey's girlfriend. (S4, E06) 
20:30Friends: Season 4 The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line Chandler is guilt-ridden after kissing Kathy. Ross starts playing the keyboard again and everyone apart from Phoebe thinks he's terrible. (S4, E07) 
21:00Impractical Jokers The guys pose as employees at a botanical garden and team up to take turns dipping fries into other people's food at the food court. The loser is forced to enter a sewer and face zombies. (S10, E22) 
21:30Impractical Jokers: Inside Jokes What careless mistake did Murr make that allowed the other guys to use his headshot against him? And what punishment did Sal pitch that came back to bite him? (S2, E03) 
22:00Kevin Hart Live: Let Me Explain Recorded at the world famous Madison Square Garden, Hart once again spits out funny anecdotes, great catchphrases, and tackles what every man all too often struggles with - women and relationships! 
23:00Roast Battle Hosted by Jimmy Carr, with judges Russell Brand and Katherine Ryan. Featuring a battle between father and son Mark and Elliot Steel, also Jayde Adams vs. Alex Edelman. (S1, E06) 
23:30Impractical Jokers Joe, Sal, Murr, and Q take their talents to Miami, pulling all new pranks on the beach. The guys zip around on scooters controlled by the other Jokers, and the loser has a cold blooded fate. (S7, E01) 
00:00The Cleveland Show Dancing with the Stools Determined to claim the first place trophy at the annual "Dancing with the Stools" ballroom dance competition, Donna recruits Cleveland Jr. to be her partner. (S3, E10) 
00:30The Cleveland Show Brown Magic Excited to spend quality father-stepson bonding time with Rallo, Cleveland takes Rallo to his very first magic show, where they get hired to be the opening act. (S3, E11) 
01:00South Park Marjorine Cartman is convinced that the girls have a device which can see into the future. The boys come up with a plan to take it. Unfortunately for Butters he's a major part of the plan. (S9, E09) 
01:30South Park Follow That Egg In a bid to prevent Mr. Slave from marrying Big Gay Al, Mrs. Garrison forces the children to help him in an experiment to prove that gay marriages are unstable. (S9. E10) 
02:00South Park Ginger Kids After giving a hate speech against 'the gingers', Cartman awakens the next day with a case of 'Gingervitus' and soon rallies against the persecution of his fellow red heads. (S9, E11) 
02:30South Park Free Willzyx The boys are tricked into believing the killer whale at Sea Park is from the moon. How will Timmy's wheelchair, the Russian government and their skateboards help to free him? (S9, E13) 
03:00Bob's Burgers The Bleakening Linda hosts a party at the restaurant to spread some cheer around the neighbourhood. But when one of her prized ornaments is stolen, she quickly turns on all the guests. (S8, E06/07) 
03:50New: The Daily Show Brand new and exclusive. Joining Trevor tonight is actor Taylor Kitsch, talking about Paramount Network mini-series "Waco" - which also stars Michael Shannon, Paul Sparks, and John Leguizamo. 
04:15Two And A Half Men Springtime On A Stick When their mother looks to be spending her birthday alone Charlie and Alan ask her over, and try to set her up with Charlie's pharmacist. What could go wrong? (S8, E08) 
04:35Two And A Half Men A Good Time In Central Africa While Berta is away Charlie becomes a little too pleased with her replacement. Lyndsey's ex-husband puts the frighteners on Alan. Judd Nelson guest stars. (S8, E09) 
05:00Teleshopping Teleshopping. 
06:00Teleshopping Teleshopping.