This week's UK TV & radio

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Listings for Paramount on Saturday, January 18 2020

06:00Teleshopping Teleshopping. 
08:00Friends The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy Ross reveals a fantasy to Rachel involving a certain "Star Wars" character. Meanwhile, Monica suffers from insomnia after her breakup with Richard. (S3, E01) 
08:35Friends The One Where No One's Ready In a race against the clock, Ross tries to get the gang dressed and ready for a black-tie benefit at the museum. (S3, E02) 
09:00Friends The One With The Jam After breaking up with Richard, Monica uses her free time to make jam and considers insemination via a sperm bank. Guest stars David Arquette. (S3, E03) 
09:30Friends The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel Ross panics when he sees his son with a Barbie doll. Meanwhile, Phoebe poses as Joey's agent and manages to get him some good roles. (S3, E04) 
10:00Friends The One With Frank, Jr Phoebe's half-brother visits, but they have trouble bonding. Ross is asked to name the five celebrities he'd like to sleep with most. Guest star Isabella Rosselini. (S3, E05) 
10:30Alvin and the Chipmunks Film Dave Seville (Jason Lee) teams up with three musically-inclined chipmunks. However, Ian Hawk (David Cross), a greedy record producer, tries to split the group and exploit the chipmunks. (2007) 
12:30The U.S. Office Pilot A documentary crew arrives at the Scranton, Pennsylvania, offices of Dunder Mifflin to observe the employees and learn about modern management. Steve Carell stars. (S1, E01) 
13:00The U.S. Office Diversity Day Michael's controversial imitation of a Chris Rock routine forces the staff to undergo a racial diversity seminar. Jim struggles to keep hold of a lucrative contract extension. (S1, E02) 
13:30The U.S. Office Health Care In an effort to save money to prevent downsizing, Michael puts Dwight in charge of choosing the company's new health care plan. Dwight's chosen plan is not well liked. (S1, E03) 
14:00The U.S. Office The Alliance As downsizing rumours swirl, paranoia takes over the members of the office. Dwight forms a "Survivor"-esque alliance with Jim against the other employees. (S1, E04) 
14:30Friends The One With The Flashback When Janice asks the gang if any of them have ever slept together, the friends flash back to a time three years before. (S3, E06) 
15:00Friends The One With The Racecar Bed (1): Monica buys a new bed from Janice's soon to be ex-husband, but the wrong one is delivered. (S3, E07) 
15:30Friends The One With The Giant Poking Device (2): Joey and Monica catch Janice kissing her ex-husband. Meanwhile, Monica accidentally bumps Ben's head into a post. (S3, E08) 
16:00Friends The One With The Football The gang plays a game of touch football on Thanksgiving, but temperatures run wild as sibling rivalry between Ross and Monica dominates proceedings. (S3, E09) 
16:30Friends The One Where Rachel Quits Ross accidentally breaks a girl's leg, and attempts to make it up to her by selling cookies so she can win a trip. (S3, E10) 
17:00Friends The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister A drunken Chandler fools around with one of Joey's sisters - but he can't remember which one. (S3, E11) 
17:30Friends The One With All The Jealousy Ross becomes jealous when he thinks he catches Rachel's new co-worker, Mark, whispering sweet nothings in her ear. (S3, E12) 
18:00Friends The One Where Monica and Richard Are Just Friends Monica's willpower is tested when she runs into Richard at a video store. (S3, E13) 
18:30Friends The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner Phoebe is reunited with her former singing partner (Elizabeth Daily). Meanwhile, Rachel's new job is putting a strain on her relationship with Ross. (S3, E14) 
19:00Friends The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break (1): Ross seeks solace at a party after a bitter fight with Rachel and ends up in the arms of another woman. First of a two-part episode. (S3, E15) 
19:30Friends The One The Morning After (2): When Rachel discovers that Ross slept with Chloe, she decides to break up with him. Second of a two-part episode. (S3, E16) 
20:00Beetlejuice Film When a deceased couple (Alec Baldwin and Geena Davis) are unsuccessful in scaring away a family that has moved into their old house, they seek the help of a bio-exorcist (Michael Keaton). (1988) 
22:00Jackass: The Movie Film Johnny Knoxville and his band of maniacs perform a variety of stunts and gross-out gags on the big screen for the first time. The antics range from childlike to grotesque and life-threatening! (2002) 
23:55Roast Battle Hosted by Jimmy Carr, with judges Jonathan Ross and Katherine Ryan. Featuring Tom Ward vs. Darren Harriott, and Tom Allen vs. Larry Dean. (S3, E01) 
00:25Roast Battle Hosted by Jimmy Carr, with judges Jonathan Ross and Katherine Ryan. Featuring Kiri Pritchard-McLean vs. Brennan Reece, and Joel Dommett vs. Alex Edelman. (S3, E02) 
00:55South Park Cat O*gy (1): Stan's sister Shelley babysits Cartman and invites her unsuitable boyfriend, Skyler, to join her. Meanwhile Cartman's cat is on heat and it's not long before he's got company! (S3, E07) 
01:25South Park Two Guys Naked In A Hot Tub (2): Stan and his parents go to a party at Mr Mackey's but when the boys make a prank phone call to the police they surround the house and are ready to open fire. (S3, E08) 
01:55South Park Jewbilee (3): As all of South Park waits for the meteor shower to begin, Kyle and Ike go into the wilderness for a Jew Scouts Jewbilee. Kenny tags along and takes on the king of the woods... (S3, E09) 
02:25South Park Korn's Groovy Pirate Ghost Mystery The boys are being plagued by the 5th graders and South Park is overrun by Pirate Ghosts. Nu-Metal band Korn must save the day! (Scooby-Doo parody). (S3, E10) 
02:55South Park Chinpokomon Stan, Cartman, and Kenny are caught up in the latest fad from Japan, a cartoon called Chinpokomon - but what is the secret plan behind the show's anti-American sentiments...? (S3, E11) 
03:25South Park Hooked on Monkey Fonics The boys compete against a couple of home schooled kids in South Park's annual spelling bee. (S3, E12) 
03:50South Park Starvin' Marvin In Space: Marvin is back! He and the boys travel around the world in an alien spaceship on a food-gathering mission, hotly pursued by the CIA and Sally Struthers. (S3, E13) 
04:15Impractical Jokers Hidden camera practical joke show that follows the comedy troupe The Tenderloins. The guys try off-colour techniques to impress women and act as fortune tellers at a boardwalk. (S1, E03) 
04:35Impractical Jokers Hidden camera practical joke show. The guys joke with strangers on the street, invade beach goers towels, and act as salesmen at a car dealership. (S1, E04) 
05:00Teleshopping Teleshopping. 
06:00Teleshopping Teleshopping.