This week's UK TV & radio

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Listings for Paramount on Thursday, August 16 2018

06:00Teleshopping Teleshopping. 
08:00My Wife And Kids Let Them Eat Pie When Junior dares Claire to eat Michael's piece of lemon meringue pie, Michael's previous lesson to the kids about sticking together comes back to bite him. (S2, E08) 
08:35My Wife And Kids Jay Gets Fired Jay gets fired in front of the girls on "take your daughter to work day" but discovers how much her family needs her. (S2, E09) 
09:00The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air Striptease for Two Carlton tells Will about an insider tip he got on a company's stock, and how they can make thousands. Problem is they'll have to pawn Vivian's bracelet to buy the stock. (S2, E24) 
09:30The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air How I Spent My Summer Vacation Will returns home from spending the summer in Philadelphia with a new look that does not sit well with Philip. Ashley starts to pick up Will's habits. (S3, E01) 
10:00Scrubs My Dirty Secret Sex is the topic of the day at Sacred Heart. Dr. Cox can't find the time to have any with Jordan, Carla's thinking of abstaining and Elliot gives a patient an orgasm. (S3, E09) 
10:30Scrubs My Rule of Thumb Dr. Cox and Turk clash over a friend of Dr. Cox who needs a transplant. Carla and Elliot try to help out a dying patient who has a surprising final wish. Tara Reid guests. (S3, E10) 
10:55Friends: Season 9 The One With The Memorial Service Ross and Chandler post false information about each other on their college alumni website, resulting in Chandler being posted as gay while Ross is dead. (S9, E17) 
11:30Friends: Season 9 The One With The Lottery The friends pool their money and buy dozens of lottery tickets. However, they bicker over how to spend the fortune if they win. (S9, E18) 
12:00Friends: Season 9 The One With Rachel's Dream After seeing Joey act out a romantic scene for Days Of Our Lives, Rachel starts to have feelings for him. (S9, E19) 
12:30Friends: Season 9 The One With The Soap Opera Party Ross gets a crush on another professor, Charlie, who has only ever dated "Nobel Prize" winners. Meanwhile, Chandler attends a disturbing one-woman play. (S9, E20) 
13:00Gilmore Girls Say Goodbye to Daisy Miller Tension is still thick between Rory and Lorelai over Dean, so Rory seeks out Lane's perspective and decides to talk to Dean, which leads to more trouble. (S5, E01) 
14:00Impractical Jokers: Season 5 The guys work at a sandwich shop, team up to have each other guess their specific secret tasks at a food court, and repeat a cycle of tasks at the park in a Joker vs. Joker. (S5, E14) 
14:30Impractical Jokers: Season 5 The guys must obey three specialized commands at a video game store, coax rock climbers into repeating a specific word, and do a Joker vs. Joker selling fake tickets. (S5, E15) 
15:00Scrubs My Clean Break Commitment phobe J.D. wants to break up with Danni (guest star Tara Reid) but can't find the courage. Dr. Cox realizes that he is no longer frightening to his residents. (S3, E11) 
15:25Scrubs My Catalyst Sacred Heart is visited by Dr. Casey (guest star Michael J. Fox), a super doctor of sorts, who impress all with his extraordinary medical skills, and his severe O.C.D.! (S3, E12) 
15:55Friends: Season 10 The One With the Home Study Monica and Chandler nervously prepare for a visit from an adoption worker, who confides that she slept with, and was then dumped, by a guy named "Joey". (S10, E07) 
16:30Friends: Season 10 The One With the Late Thanksgiving Monica prepares a fabulous Thanksgiving feast for the gang, but she becomes furious when everyone arrives late to the gathering. (S10, E08) 
16:55Friends: Season 10 The One With The Birth Mother Monica and Chandler travel to Ohio to meet a pregnant woman, Erica (Anna Farris), who is considering them to adopt her child when it's born. (S10, E09) 
17:30Friends: Season 10 The One Where Chandler Gets Caught Rachel and Phoebe see Chandler getting into a car with another woman. After following him to the suburbs, they suspect he might be cheating. (S10, E10) 
17:55Friends: Season 10 The One Where The Stripper Cries Rachel and Monica hire a male stripper (Danny DeVito) for Monica's bachelorette party, but when he gets there, Phoebe insults him and he starts to cry. (S10, E11) 
18:30Friends: Season 10 The One With Phoebe's Wedding Phoebe's big day becomes disastrous as deliveries go awry and a blizzard forces the plans to change. Meanwhile, Chandler and Ross compete to be a groomsman. (S10, E12) 
19:05Friends: Season 10 The One Where Joey Speaks French Phoebe tries to teach Joey French for an upcoming play, but becomes frustrated by Joey's lack of 'flair' for languages. (S10, E13) 
19:35Friends: Season 10 The One With Princess Consuela Joey feels abandoned when Monica and Chandler try to buy a house, but he finds solace with the sellers' precocious 8-year-old daughter (Dakota Fanning). (S10, E14) 
20:00Friends: Season 10 The One Where Estelle Dies Joey is so upset by all of the change in his friends' lives that Phoebe goes to extreme lengths to prevent him from learning about the sudden death of his agent. (S10, E15) 
20:35Friends: Season 10 The One With Rachel's Going Away Party At Rachel's going away party, she gives each of the friends, except Ross, an individual goodbye, leaving Ross confused and hurt as to why. (S10, E16) 
21:00The Other Guys Film Two mismatched New York City detectives (Will Ferrell and Mark Wahlberg) seize an opportunity to step up like the city's top cops, whom they idolize, only things don't quite go as planned. (2010) 
23:10New: Detroiters Mort Crim The guys court legendary newscaster Mort Crim to be the celebrity spokesperson for one of their clients, and Ned ramps up security in the building. (S2, E06) 
23:40Impractical Jokers: Season 5 Hidden camera practical joke show. For the show's three year anniversary, the guys look back at some never before seen footage. (S5, E12) 
00:05Impractical Jokers: Season 5 The guys work at a sandwich shop, team up to have each other guess their specific secret tasks at a food court, and repeat a cycle of tasks at the park in a Joker vs. Joker. (S5, E14) 
00:35Impractical Jokers: Season 5 The guys must obey three specialized commands at a video game store, coax rock climbers into repeating a specific word, and do a Joker vs. Joker selling fake tickets. (S5, E15) 
01:00The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air Striptease for Two Carlton tells Will about an insider tip he got on a company's stock, and how they can make thousands. Problem is they'll have to pawn Vivian's bracelet to buy the stock. (S2, E24) 
01:35The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air How I Spent My Summer Vacation Will returns home from spending the summer in Philadelphia with a new look that does not sit well with Philip. Ashley starts to pick up Will's habits. (S3, E01) 
02:00South Park PC Principal Final Justice With paranoia rampant, the whole of South Park goes gun crazy! All the madness means it's left to PC Principal to save the town from the evil living ad Leslie. (S19, E10) 
02:30South Park Member Berries Only a reboot of the National Anthem can save America - can the man who saved Star Wars do it? Meanwhile, Randy is enraged by politics and Cartman takes on sexist trolls. (S20, E01) 
03:00South Park Skank Hunt Stan, Kyle, and Kenny decide to take down Cartman, whom they believe to be the Internet troll. Meanwhile, the real troll (Kyle's dad!) begins to spread his trolling globally. (S20, E02) 
03:25New: The Daily Show Brand new and exclusive. Joining Trevor tonight is comedian and actor Jimmy O.Yang, talking about his latest movie "Crazy Rich Asians". 
03:50Rick and Morty The Wedding Squanchers The Smith family is invited to the wedding of Rick's best friend, Birdperson, but things go south when it's discovered that the bride isn't who she says she is. (S2, E10) 
04:15Malcolm In The Middle Health Scare News hits that Hal may have a serious illness, Francis has a showdown with combative Lavernia in Alaska, and Dewey becomes overzealous in taking care of his class' pet hamster. (S3, E06) 
04:35Malcolm In The Middle Christmas As the boys ruin Christmas every year, the most recent being a tree ornament war, Lois finally issues an ultimatum: either the boys behave or Christmas is cancelled! (S3, E07) 
05:00Teleshopping Teleshopping. 
06:00Teleshopping Teleshopping.