This week's UK TV & radio

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Saturday : Sunday : Monday : Tuesday : Wednesday : Thursday : Friday : Saturday

Listings for Paramount 2 on Saturday, October 28 2017

06:00Teleshopping Teleshopping. 
09:00Malcolm In The Middle Ida's Boyfriend Grandma Ida plans to drug and marry a wealthy man, then divorce him and get his money. Malcolm gets his tongue pierced but it then swells up and he must hide it from Lois. (S5, E11) 
09:30Malcolm In The Middle Softball Malcolm volunteers for the company's softball team, only to realize that Lois is the coach. Meanwhile, Hal interviews for a job at a company that might be recruiting secret agents. (S5, E12) 
10:00Malcolm In The Middle Lois' Sister: Aunt Susan visits, bringing Reese and Malcolm a red 1967 Ford Mustang Convertible, Dewey a cotton-candy machine, and Jamie a $5,000 savings bond. Lois and Hal are suspicious... (S5, E13) 
10:30Malcolm In The Middle Malcolm Dates a Family Lois has a dispute with Hal and the boys' favourite restaurant. Malcolm clicks with his girlfriend's family... to the point where he forgets about his girlfriend! (S5, E14) 
11:00Malcolm In The Middle Reese's Apartment Reese storms out and gets his own apartment. Francis uses the opportunity to blame Lois for all the issues in the family and Malcolm is forced to coach a jock. (S5, E15) 
11:30Malcolm In The Middle Malcolm Visits College Lois takes Malcolm on his first college visit, Reese pretends he's a drug user to woo a pretty narcotics officer, and Dewey constructs his own musical instrument. (S5, E16) 
12:00Friends The One With Rachel's Crush Chandler has a hard time handling Kathy's new role in a play, in which she pretends to have sex with a handsome man, whilst Rachel is attracted to a customer. (S4, E13) 
12:30Friends The One With Joey's Dirty Day Joey has no time to shower after he comes home from a three-day fishing trip and has to head out to the set of Charlton Heston's new movie. (S4, E14) 
13:00Friends The One With Rachel's New Dress Phoebe gets to name one of her babies which leads to Joey telling Chandler that he has a terrible name. Rachel's plan to seduce her boyfriend goes awry. (S4, E18) 
13:30Friends The One With All The Wedding Dresses Monica has an aspirational phase of wearing Emily's wedding dress. Meanwhile, Chandler forces Joey to get treatment for his snoring at a sleep clinic. (S4, E20) 
14:00Bob's Burgers The Unbearable Like-Likeness of Gene Gene tries to break up with his new girlfriend, Courtney, after the family find her annoying. When he tries to he finds out that her dad writes jingles. (S3, E08) 
14:30Bob's Burgers Mother Daughter Laser Razor Linda fears that her bond with Louise isn't as strong as hers with Tina, so she forces Louise to attend a mother-daughter seminar. (S3, E10) 
15:00Bob's Burgers Broadcast Wagstaff School News Tina vows to find the "mad pooper" running rampant at school. Meanwhile, Louise tricks Gene into thinking that he will grow up to look like Bob. (S3, E12) 
15:30Bob's Burgers My Fuzzy Valentine Bob tries to sweeten Linda's Valentine's Day with a heart-shaped pancake, but when that doesn't work, the kids convince him to let them help him find the perfect gift. (S3, E13) 
16:00Impractical Jokers: Joketober The guys act not so silent at a library, and hunt for their imaginary wives again at the mall. Two of the jokers dress up as goalies and block shots from former New Jersey Devils players. (S7, E07) 
16:30Impractical Jokers: Joketober The guys hit the ice rink to play a slippery balloon game and try to get support for ridiculous causes at the park. Tonight's punishment involves a trip to the movies. (S7, E08) 
17:00Impractical Jokers: Joketober The guys try to kiss unsuspecting strangers at a mall, they focus-group their absurd life stories as potential movies, and the big loser gets a room full of enemies. (S7, E09) 
17:30Impractical Jokers: Joketober The guys freeze out skaters at an ice rink's rental counter and head to the mall where they have the audacity to ask strangers to mind their manners. The loser has a sumo-sized punishment. (S7, E11) 
18:00The Middle The Cheerleader Frankie fills a car on the dealer's lot with jelly beans as a publicity stunt, Sue fails to make the swim team, and Brick is forced to "socially interact". (S1, E02) 
18:30The Middle The Neighbour Brooke Shields plays Rita Glossner, a cigarette-smoker with a hard-life who is considered "mean" by her neighbours. Her sons are deemed "bullies" and get in a fight with Sue. (S1, E12) 
19:00The Middle The Yelling Frankie vows to stop yelling at the kids if they agree to do their school work and chores without her intervention. Meanwhile, Mike reluctantly takes a night job as a driver. (S1, E14) 
19:30The Middle Foreign Exchange Frankie insists that the family host a exchange student from Japan. When the serious student does not take an interest in the family, Frankie plans a road trip for them. (S2, E05) 
20:00The Middle The Math Class Ms. Rinsky asks Frankie and Mike to attend a math class after Frankie criticizes her teaching skills. Sue and Axl consider helping their aunt find a time capsule she buried. (S2, E17) 
20:30The Middle The Legacy Frustrated by Axl, Mike keeps him from playing the final basketball game of the season, Sue wins a trophy for "punctuality", and Brick gets locked in the Glossner's garage. (S2, E19) 
21:00Friends The One With Rachel's Crush Chandler has a hard time handling Kathy's new role in a play, in which she pretends to have sex with a handsome man, whilst Rachel is attracted to a customer. (S4, E13) 
21:30Friends The One With Joey's Dirty Day Joey has no time to shower after he comes home from a three-day fishing trip and has to head out to the set of Charlton Heston's new movie. (S4, E14) 
22:00Friends The One With Rachel's New Dress Phoebe gets to name one of her babies which leads to Joey telling Chandler that he has a terrible name. Rachel's plan to seduce her boyfriend goes awry. (S4, E18) 
22:30Friends The One With All The Wedding Dresses Monica has an aspirational phase of wearing Emily's wedding dress. Meanwhile, Chandler forces Joey to get treatment for his snoring at a sleep clinic. (S4, E20) 
23:00Impractical Jokers: Joketober The guys try to kiss unsuspecting strangers at a mall, they focus-group their absurd life stories as potential movies, and the big loser gets a room full of enemies. (S7, E09) 
23:30Impractical Jokers: Joketober Joe, Sal, Murr & Q freak out a focus group by reading ridiculous answers and then participate in a thrilling toilet paper shootout in their favourite market. The loser hosts a dinner party. (S7, E12) 
00:00Impractical Jokers: Joketober The guys hit the seas for a special cruise episode! They turn the pool deck into a playground, give misinformation while posing as entertainment officers, and two Jokers get double torture. (S7, E13) 
00:30Impractical Jokers: Joketober The guys get sassy while posing as auto parts salesmen, then head to the mall where they try to reel in unsuspecting shoppers. The big loser gets stuck in a horrible mess. (S8, E01) 
01:00Impractical Jokers: Joketober Joe, Sal, Murr and Q get ballsy while posing as salesmen, and then try to outdo each other as they invade the personal space of confused strangers. The loser gets to play dress-up. (S8, E02) 
01:30Impractical Jokers: Joketober Joe, Sal, Murr and Q lend a hand while working at a high-tech store, then play detectives at the mall in search of perps on the loose. The loser gets the shakes while high above the city. (S8, E03) 
02:00Jackass Johnny Knoxville goes head-to-head against the USC football team to return a punt, and Bam Margera creates a pitfall in the backyard to ambush his lawn-mowing father. Also features the sexercise bike! 
02:25Jackass Johnny Knoxville gets pelted with paintballs in the behind-the scenes footage of his magazine cover shoot, and Bam Margera leaps off a bridge and into the water below utilizing a large umbrella. 
02:50John Bishop Live: Elvis Has... ...Left The Building: Filmed in front of a packed house at the Liverpool Empire Theatre, John Bishop delights his home crowd, illustrating why he has become one of the nation's favourite comedians. 
04:00Teachers First Day Back As the teachers return from summer break, Ms. Watson tries an ultra-premium online dating service and Ms. Snap learns that she's been given the worst group of kids in school. (S2, E01)